Just Get to Me

At the peak of my empty frustration, I had to hear something, some word of inspiration or encouragement or even of mercy. Now sitting alone in my car, I had let the rebellious nature of my old man have it’s run. I had knowingly or not followed the course of the world and followed the way which seemed right to me.

And I was now vastly separated by what felt like the full weight of what it meant to be living in sin, separated from God and without hope. I knew I needed to find my Fellowship with God again. How long had it been since I’d called out to Him as Father … Daddy? More pressing still: how could I let myself get here?

The rise back to a great relationship, just like the way down, would take time.

Can I do it? Would God take me back? What about all of my shortcomings and my frailties? What has changed in me? Has anything changed in me?

My mind whirled as I tried to find some footing to at least start my ascent back to the Throne of Grace. No words from the past seemed to stick and I couldn’t seem to pull myself back up. Stuck, I thought to myself.

And then I heard the still, small voice:
“Just get to me.”

I recognized the voice immediately. And was a bit surprised that I was able to hear anything in the midst of the storm within my head. Yet, here – at last – were the words I was looking for.

God emphasized the word “get” in the statement, which impacted me. I realized that I was doing everything else, but trying to get to God. I was doing the religious work, but had lost touch with God. I’d lost the connection, the feeling, the … Fellowship. That intimate sharing is what it is all about – I’d forgotten.

More words started to resound now:
“Forget the busy work, the doubts, the fears; put your troubles on hold and find me.“

My soul could sense an urgency in these words. Almost as if God were saying, Come on, Son, we don’t have time for you to be down and out – let’s get back in the game. Together.. What awesome words for a Son to hear.

I found myself at Psalm 51:

Have mercy upon me, O God, according to thy lovingkindness: according unto the multitude of thy tender mercies blot out my transgressions.
— Psalm 51:1

…And the chapter goes on. Weak in the knees.

There’s “messing up” and then there’s “messing up and rebounding” – the latter is what I wanted to do. And what God wanted me to do too.

I could feel my back straightening up – my posture more confident again – even as I sat in my car.

Thank you, Father, for finding me and speaking to my heart.

I’d been clouded by “everything else” instead of clouding myself with God and His love. Since then, I’ve realized what really matters is my relationship with God. Without quality there in Fellowship, the rest of my “Christian life” will be lacking. And so easily set off track. It’s about getting to Him and gelling there and just enjoying His presence.

Just Get to God.

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